Sunday, October 5, 2014

The Husband's View on the Birth Story

I asked my husband to write up his view on what happened for Baby Girl's birth.  It is an amusing and pragmatic as he is...


We were just settling down for bed at 11:15 and I was looking forward to finishing an episode of Dr. Who we had not yet had the chance to finish.  Christine had been complaining of contractions and becoming increasingly anxious, while we were both trying to pretend that it was not happening.  Once she started having trouble breathing due to the pain, I knew the rest of the evening was going to suck… worse for her obviously, but some for me too.

This of course meant packing C up while he was sleeping and frantically grabbing snacks, water, and diapers in a mad rush out the door.  C was very cranky and absolutely did not want to go anywhere.  Nonetheless, he was packed up into the car.

I then drive Christine to the hospital.  She wants to go fast, but not too fast.  She wants to keep going and stay in one lane, but she wants to go fast.  She wants to go fast but does not want any bumps.  At least none of us got what we wanted.  We arrive and I let Christine off while I go park outside of the Women’s Center and get C and whatever we managed to pack, which was not much.

Christine is taken to an examination room and I attempt to hold C while he tries to go back to sleep, but the waiting room is too bright and too loud.  While I wait to be called back in to the room with Christine, I attempt the futile task of getting to get C to sleep.  I try laying him down on a chair.  He gets up and jumps off of the chair.  I lay him down on a couch, which is too short for me to lay down… he jumps off the couch.  I finally settle on a chair in front of the TV and that seems to work until I start to doze and C jumps off.  I then figure out I can turn the TV’s off and try the same thing again.  And just when I think he may settle down another couple comes in.  I hope they see me trying to sleep and don’t blithely turn the TV’s on again… they do not but, then start talking and C jumps off the chair and starts running around.


Finally after an eternity we are called back to the room to hear the diagnosis.  The first think I notice is that the room is freezing… and there I am in shorts and a T-shirt.  I get some blankets and continue freezing.  The nurse says a lot of stuff, but it all translates into… Christine is going to have a baby.  I presume it is going to be a terrible night… mostly for everyone else, but for me too.  We determine that we need our parents to get C.  Thankfully they show up quickly and we ship C off to their house for the night.  I settle down for a fitful and frigid slumber while Christine gets probed.  It is really cold.

We are summoned to the delivery room for, well, having a baby.  I remember it being blessedly warm.  At least I was comfortable finally, in my paper pants and paper hat which kept the heat in.  Christine rambles incoherently the entire time and eventually they pull a bloody squealing baby out… that is very tiny and then proceed to put more tubs and wires into her than she weights.  The doctor is worried about having to scrape her placenta out and give her a spinal to give her some drugs.  Before they even get to that point, the thing comes squishing out in a pool of blood and somehow this provides some relief.  There is blood everywhere and it is being mopped up with paper, and plastic things, and some one finally decides to use a towel.  At least it was warm.

At some point it becomes 6 AM and Christine’s mom shows up and I get to get breakfast.  It was somewhat mediocre, but I am very hungry and the coffee is very good.  It barely does anything to improve my wakefulness.  We discuss what needs to be retrieved from the house and who is going to get it.  I realize I am too tired to drive and we get Lolah to come and drive me to our house to forage for stuff.  Because I need to get about 200 things this trip inevitably takes about 4 hours and I get back maybe at 2PM and then take a nap until about 3:30 PM.

C is still with the parents and we arrange for them to drop C up at the hospital on his way to making an errand of some sort.  Vic arrives at about 4:45 and drops C off.  Fortified with an hour nap and some energy drink, I pack a very confused C up, and say goodbye to Christine.  C does not want to leave his Mommy, but I try and explain that the baby is no longer in Momma’s tummy and that it is his sister.  I tell him Momma needs to stay at the hospital to look after the baby, but he does not care.

I am excited to be home and away from everyone.  I give C a bath, feed him something terrible, but that has calories and get him ready for bed.  He wants to know where Mommy is and I tell him he will see her soon.  Once C is in bed I set there for an hour in a stupor and finally crawl into bed.


I wake up and begin the inevitable search for more supplies that Christine needs… inevitably doubling the amount of stuff she has each day I fetch stuff from the house to the hospital.   I think I finally get there around 12 PM, just about the time her mother gets there.

Do not remember this day at all.

Leave hospital at 5 PM, pick C up, have a fairly normal night.  Relax for a bit and go to bed.


Manage to get there at around 10 AM that day.  We learn Christine is going to be discharged, it is very exciting and somewhat weird because we are not going to be staying with Baby Girl.  It is almost a blessing that Christine cannot stay, because I suspect she would make herself crazy… not that being away would make her less crazy apparently.  Christine is very sorry to leave and I start feeling I have a sinus infection… yea.

Before we leave, we go see Baby Girl one more time… it is very sad… poor baby.  I refuse to have to return the baggage cart, so I load everything up on top of two rolling suitcases and we are on our way.

When we get home I try and process the luggage so it does not sit around for a month, but inevitably I leave a bucket of unprocessed stuff which is still going to be there a week later.


Christine had begged me the night before to stay a half day, but I manage to leave anyways.  I feel very irritable that day, very fatalistic.  It is weird being congratulated when I am making the assumption that everything is going to go to crap.  My boss, Lisa Zimmerman says that she is still going to congratulate me every day anyways.  Some lady cuts in front of me to get something in the lunch line while I am talking…  She apologies but I respond that it was fine… it’s not like words were coming out of my mouth anyways and she does… hrm.  Have more sinus pressure, probably have a sinus infection since I can detect it in my teeth.

Since it is official that I and C are sick, Christine quarantines herself in the Living Room, preparing to live there until C and I are well.  I suspect that it will be somewhat futile to have this level of isolation, but I go along with it because the alternatives are worse and it is just easier.  C is sad to be separated from his Mommy and promises that he is not sick anymore.  Mommy wants to hug C, but cannot.


I wake up to severe sinus pressure and determine that I need to go to the doctor.  Christine makes me explain that I cannot be in the waiting room.  One nurse thinks that I have some kind of contagion until I explain it to her.  I have to re-explain the scenario several times, which becomes increasingly frustrating.  Go get medicine at CVS and get to work at 10:30.  Have a productive day at work.  Everyone is very considerate and ask to see pictures of the baby, which I provide one on my phone for them to see. Go home and exercise.

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